It was the Best of Times, it was the Worst of Times……

Now that I’m on the final leg of my return journey (I’m flying back to the UK tomorrow) it seems appropriate (and a good space filler) to write a quick piece that deals with a retrospective of the whole time that I’ve been away.  I’ve a mental picture of what it’ll look like, with headings something like this:

The best thing I did;

The Worst thing I did;

The most useful thing I brought;

The most useful thing I bought:

The most useless thing I brought;

The best thing I acquired;

The best food;

The best place;

The thing I would not do again (probably);

The thing I would definitely want to share with anyone;

And so on (I’m sure, as I work my way through that list, there will be honourable mentions of other categories……..).

Where to start – statistically, I have been away almost exactly 100 days, or 20 weeks.  It’s not quite 5 months (4^th February to 1^st July) but it’s as near as makes no difference.  The distance, as the crow flies, from my room here, to my house at home, is just shy of 3,500 miles.  There was a 4 hour time difference when I got here (the UAE is ahead of the UK), but because the clocks went forward in the UK it’s only now 3 hours - odd though it sounds, that one hour has made a positive difference.  When it was four hours there was barely time to speak to home before I was falling asleep in front of the computer, but three seems to make all the difference to civilisation (and to my already disrupted sleep patterns).

I have made hundreds of trips to the gym, certainly run, cycled and “cross-trained”, as well as circuit trained, hundreds of miles over that time.  I’ve written nearly 90 of these blogs, which have been viewed nearly 1,700 times.  I’ve no idea if that’s one person with a serious problem or 1,700 people who have taken one look and then taken to the hills, but hey, somebody has been looking at it (actually, I could name at least 10 if I was pushed but where’s the fun in that sentence !).  I’ve no idea which one was enjoyed most because there isn’t a poll for these things – it’s a bit like Dilbert’s cartoons in my mind – they’re all so good that it’s difficult to choose between them……and frankly, that’s all that counts !

Cor, I don’t alf go one – I’m alf way down the page an I ain’t even started the thingy list wasname……… here we go then !

The best thing I did – well, I’ve done a few interesting things, been horse racing at Maydan, played golf at the Montgomerie, watched motorsport at Yas Island, photographed F1 Powerboats from the beach in Abu Dhabi, see Jools Holland in concert, watched international rugby – sat on a grassy bank with a kebab, watched dreadful “Premier” league football in Madinat Zayed, been up the tallest building in the world, shopped in the biggest shopping malls in the world, eaten great food, drank a bit to much, brunched, run and cycled great distances, decided to train with Psycho, bought things and brought things, talked, walked, swum, and spun (sorry, I was on a bit of a poetic roll there….I meant sunbathed !) and so much more, but I think the prize for the best thing I did goes to………

…….the moment that I met my family as they came out of Dubai airport.  No explanation needed really.  If I was writing this at home and not still sat in the desert then I might (almost certainly) be writing about coming out of Birmingham airport to be met by the family, but I’m not going to tempt fate !.

The worst thing I did – easy, went to the dentist to get a filling replaced and ended up having root canal surgery.  I’m sure there were other crap things but frankly life’s to short to bother to remember them !

The most useful thing I brought – generally, if you discount the usual stuff like computers etc. then the most useful thing (learnt from Iraq last year) was a soft, overnight holdall thing.  When I have been away for the weekends, or back to Abu Dhabi for work, then it’s been very useful, and because it’s ultimately quite pliable then it just disappears into my suitcase for storage or for big travel.

The most useful thing I’ve bought – has to be a toss up between my camelback water carrier thingy, my little speaker/docking station thing for my iphone and my GPS heart rate monitor.  I know the last two things are not exactly useful, more nice to haves, but they certainly relieve the boredom !

The most useless thing I brought – if you discount things like my fleece (because I had to wear something to the airport in the rain in February), then the prize probably goes to the jar of marmite that I brought out with me.  I could have bought it here, I haven’t even opened it, and on top of all of that, I went onto a no-carbs diet within a couple of weeks of getting here (well, mostly…….) and haven’t had a piece of toast since !

The best thing that I acquired – would have to go to the wonderful coffee (12 bags !) sent by a friend who works for a clearly wonderful coffee company !  Mrs G brought it over when she came, along with a one cup cafetiere.  It’s made my early mornings so much more bearable than sachets of Nescafe !  I have acquired some new friends, but we’ll leave them out of it seeing as how none of them make me fresh coffee in the mornings !

The best food – goes without doubt to the Lebanese Mill.  Basically a kebab shop in Abu Dhabi city, just across the road from my usual place of residence when I’m in town for whatever reason.  I’ve eaten there a number of times and when the little Gilby’s were given a choice on where to eat in Abu Dhabi before we left for Dubai, they chose the Lebanese Mill, and they had already been there twice – high praise indeed !

The best place – wow, a really difficult one.  I love the desert, I’m more than happy with my hotel (despite what you might think about being bored with it – can you imagine 5 months in a Holiday Inn Express out in the middle of the desert with nothing to do !), I’ve enjoyed visiting things like the Emirates Palace Hotel, the Burj Khalifa, the Dubai Mall, the Dubai Fountains, the Moreeb Dunes (and the Empty Quarter), the Dubai Marina, the Grand Mosque, Yas Island, Maydan Racetrack, and numerous other places, but I think the place I really enjoyed most was crossing the creek in Dubai on an Abra – the whole area really, the bussle of the souqs, the abra crossing, the traffic, the whole feeling of uncomplicated safety (assuming you don’t get run over by a bicycle trying to cross the road !).  There are many other places and things that I haven’t mentioned that I probably should have but hey ho, you’ll just have to read the other 80 something blogs and see if you can pick up anything……..or alternatively, you could buy me a drink and I’ll talk to your hearts content - as long as you ask the right questions obviously.

The thing I would not do again (probably) – I think (assuming you leave aside visits to the dentist etc.) the thing I would say you have to try once, but I probably wouldn’t come with you, is tea at the Emirates Palace.  As I believe I wrote after my visit there, you have to do it just to experience the “over the topness” of it all.  Unnecessarily gaudy, etc. etc.  but you have to do it to know that that’s what it is.  I said the same about the Burj Khalifa, but actually enjoyed my trip up it the second time, but I was with the family then and was able to share the experience, which I think is important.  I’ve done a lot of things here, some of them on my own and some of them with friends and family, and I’ve definitely enjoyed the shared experiences better (I would quite willingly have shared my root canal surgery for instance !).  There are still some things that I would do again, either on my own or with someone, but as a rule I would want to share them.

The thing I would definitely want to share with anyone – I have given this a whole lot of thought and have decided that it can’t be done.  I would be able to share a whole load of things with people in a day, whether that day was in Abu Dhabi or in Dubai (I have to say it would be a more interesting day in Dubai……..) so the prize goes to…….

…….. a day in Dubai.  Get the metro downtown and wander through the Old Souq, lunch over the creek, Abra ride to Dera, the Spice Souq, the Gold Souq, back across, up to the Dubai Museum, then onto the metro back to visit the Burj Khalifa, watch the fountains, visit the Dubai Mall.  It’s a hell of a day out, and you’ll need good shoes and plenty of water, but it sums up the madness of Dubai in a day, as well as how the Middle East has changed over time.  It’s also a million miles from where I sat to type most of this.  In my desert hotel, in my room by the pool, in infinite peace – maybe that’s why I picked it ?  If you lived in Dubai and suffered that madness every day, then a day by the pool in the desert, having watched the camels work out on the track, with maybe a trip to the Empty Quarter to experience the real desert, and a BBQ on the terrace, would be my idea of something special to share ?

I’m guessing that I’ll upload this the day before I fly, or maybe even the day before that, and that I’ll close everything out when I get home with one final entry before the next chapter is confirmed (if there is to be one….) so they’ll be time for one more between now and then, maybe even two if I try hard……….